We thought it would be pretty good since it had Hugh Jackman in it. The only thing good about it was reading the all the funny user reviews on amazon (but unfortunately we read them after we watched it!). Don't get me wrong; plenty of reviewers gave it 5 stars. Buuuut, I'm pretty sure they were high on somethin'. And they felt the need to comment on all the 1-star-reviews with "This movie is just way too deep for your puny little brain." Here are some of the 1-star reviews, for your enjoyment:
"Whenever I receive the, "What is the worst movie you have ever seen?" question, I always provide the title of this movie thanks to its confusing story and depressing content. I'd rather paint my house than watch this movie and I hate painting my house." -Topher
"I never review anything, but this monstrosity of a film is certainly worth the labor....This is in the top 5 worst movie experiences of my life." - Johnny McNicebreath
"There is absolutely no point to this film. I feel like I just got hoodwinked into listening to a guy say "I have the answer to life!" only he rambles on about every day stuff like a video on YouTube or the new internet meme. ... Watch it if you have time to kill and you have somehow become immobile with a remote and this movie all ready to go....I wanted to drill my head out after watching this." -jookyone
"Let's see... a guy in a bubble in space with a tree in it eats part of the tree and breaks out of the bubble - wait, that happened at the end. The guy has a dying wife (who is infinitely stoic about dying) who writes a book (called "The Fountain") that the guy starts reading. She wants him to finish the book for her, as she has written all but the last chapter (this is supposed to be really meaningful, because, she's dying, you know.) In it, a conquistador is sent by the queen of Spain to find a hidden Mayan pyramid that has the tree of immortality in it, using three holes in a broken knife for a map. She wants him to do this to save her from the Spanish Inquisition, which nobody expects. Once there, he fights his way through a few warriors and some kind of religious looking person, eats some of that tree, but instead of it saving him, it kills him and turns him into a bunch of flowers within a minute or so. What else... The guy is some type of medical researcher who violates all the rules about drug studies and, in a flash of insight caused by looking at patterns in falling snow (I think), miraculously comes up with a serum that reverses aging. He wanted to use it on his dying wife, but she had already died. [Heavy sigh.] He did save a dying monkey, though, so that's good. Then, back in space, he breaks out of the bubble, then goes back in. I think that's about it. He never finishes the book - they kind of forgot about it, I guess....
"If you are the kind of person that thinks it is Philosophically Deep to see a bald guy in the lotus position tumbling through space or floating four feet off the ground in front a vaguely Mayan religious person, then you might have a chance of enjoying this movie. Otherwise, be prepared to feel like you just wasted 92 minutes of your life. Just awful." -John Carpenter
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